U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize