Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My cat gives me a boner
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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