The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
