Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
