peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
her facebook's as public as her vagina
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
