ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
