I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
