Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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