this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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