and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
When are your genitals available?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
