yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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