i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
