I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
