bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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