It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
This is my gift to your gina
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize