sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
