Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
