i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
