i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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