Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
