Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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