if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
