Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
