...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
they're like a gay fantastic four
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
