also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
