everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
i think we sleep fucked last night...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
