dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
