we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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