My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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