...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Randomize