Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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