I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
