Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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