Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
