No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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