yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
