This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
