Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
