We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
