Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
