He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
