im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
