SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
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