Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I just cut my nipple shaving
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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