it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
