it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize