Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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