How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
