I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
