What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize